Flaminia Reviews: A Christmas Karen

Yoohoo! It’s your favorite reviewstress. Me, Flaminia!

This weekend, on December 21st, I saw a parody production of A Christmas Carol, aptly titled A Christmas Karen. This is the show’s second year running at the Goldenrod Inn (@goldenrodcountryinn) in Worthington, Massachusetts. The cast consisted of three queens, an innkeeper, and so so many puppets.

How do I even begin to give a disclaimer for this show? Hmm…

A Christmas Karen, and by extension this review, is an adult only show. It features strong language, drug use, violence, and copious amounts of graphic puppet intercourse. Reader discretion is advised:

I was invited to this show at the Goldenrod Inn by one of the owners thanks to my world-renowned qualifications as a concubine journalist. It was over an hour drive to get there which would normally be a deal breaker for me, Flaminia. But getting there was actually quite pleasant. There was no hectic traffic and scramble for parking that I get when I trek down to New Haven. Instead, as I got further northwest the noise of my everyday world hushed into the peaceful snow-covered woods. “Wow I can’t wait to see some smutty puppet action” I thought to myself as I parked at the picturesque Inn.

The show took place in the Goldenrod Inn’s Cabaret Room. After performing at so many bars that swallow sound, I immediately appreciated this space. It was large enough to seat about 75, yet intimate enough for performers to be heard even when they weren’t using microphones. It was like a blackbox theater inside a remote lodge. A large plastic tarp gave me the impression that someone would be making a mess soon…

Here’s a rundown of the cast and characters:

Left to Right: Tiny Twink, Marley, Bear, Fezziweg, “Bluey”, Rod

Eric Frary as Rod Feltman
Bella Santarella as Es’Margot as Karen Scrooge
Clementine Ku’Layd as Bear as Daddy Cratchet
Peachy Creme as Tiny Twink
Eric Frary as Blue Eyes Bad Dragon
Eric Frary as Marley
Eric Frary as legally distinct Rippit the Newt
Clementine Ku’Layd as herself
Eric Frary as Fezziweg
Peachy Creme as Summers Eve

I only know the basic plot of a Christmas Carol. I didn’t watch it growing up since I’m a Jewess, but Christian’s love flaunting their lifestyle in everyone’s faces instead of keeping it in the bedroom. In case you don’t know Charles Dickens original, it’s the story of Ebenezer Scrooge; A greedy businessman that’s visited by the ghosts of Christmas past, present, and yet to come in an attempt to show him the error of his ways. This version is about Karen Scrooge, a greedy sex shop owner that jacks up the price of poppers. (click that link if you don’t know what poppers are, and maybe think about the choices that led you to this review) Bella Santerella was a phenomenal lead. It takes a great actress to make an unbelievable character as believable as she did. There wasn’t a moment of the show where she wasn’t embodying this role.

Instead of Tiny Tim, a sick boy who needs medicine to cure his fatal illness, this show had Tiny Twink. The almost life-sized twink puppet voiced by Peachy Creme. Tiny Twink needs poppers for his big date with a phallic puppet named Blue Eyes White Bad Dragon. This name is a reference to Yu-Gi-Oh… and nothing else. The rest of the show’s writing is similarly raunchy and ridiculous. The show had parodies sung live too, like Bella’s performance of Poor Unfortunate Hole. The funniest song was a duet near the end; Twink sings in a high falsetto alongside… well… someone who’s a little lower down…

idk if I have to censor this or not. Eh whatever I warned you

I’ve seen many obscene parodies in my lifetime, but I’ve never seen a twine twink do a duet with its own raspy butt hole. Peachy switching between character voices in real time made it even funnier.

I’ve never seen an audience participation puppet orgy sequence either, but this show had that. A few audience members were given puppets to mime whatever depraved acts they could think of. A couple others were given supplies from the tavern’s restaurant and a microphone in order to make the sound effects while the puppets were getting felt up. It’s amazing what you can do with cole slaw, a microphone, and some creativity.

I won’t go over every detail of the show, but if you want to see more click here for photos. And click here to see photos from my photo shoot with Clementine. I’ve known Clementine for years and this is my favorite project I’ve seen her in. She’s got an energetic joy that projects all the way to the back row (probably, I don’t actually know since I sat up front). She recently got her own brewery show at the Bergen House in, which I’m announcing here in the hopes it doesn’t flop like my brewery show did. I’m looking forward to seeing more of her on the mic and stage.

Visiting the Goldenrod Inn made me feel nostalgic. I had lived in Western Massachusetts a few years ago, but it wasn’t just the countryside. It was the uninhibited creativity and passion that everyone had. The Goldenrod Inn could have taken the easy route and put on the same lipsync only drag show that many bars and brunch spots do. Huge kudos to the owners for putting in the extra effort and taking a risk. This small group wrote a script, made time to rehearse, and put on a show greater than the sum of its parts.

Bella, Eric, Clementine, Peachy, and Aaron. The entire cast and crew of A Christmas Karen